Lost in Drawers

Month: January, 2012

A Sea Chanty of Sorts

Sometimes we are reminded that there are people in our life path that are really good company. This entire weekend was one spent being reminded that we as people are never really alone along life’s path, as with kindness given, there is friendship received. We had a wonderful dinner with good friends on Friday at the worth the wait in line Fireside Pies, as well as saw other good friends out and about. It’s amazing how good it feels to spend time with people who want nothing other than conversation and laughter.

Saturday was a lazy day, with not much to do around a town besieged by stock show traffic.  Sunday brought tea time with another friend, who has the amazing ability to bring out the best and most honest side of us. (Thank you to Avoca Coffee for a letting us occupy several chairs for a good amount of time and for getting Heather hooked on Orange Swirl tea!) We also had a chance to meet a wonderful Lost In Drawers reader (and her adorable children), who was just lovely! To top it off, it was a much needed if not belated Christmas with Meme and Pawpaw Waller.  And there was cake, and more cake. Life really is good when you get the friends, and the perspective, you need.

Home is wherever I’m with you

Some days you want to quit. You are at your breaking point and you have nothing left inside but pain, anger, questions and doubt. Those days are quite impossibly hard. Often, it seems they stretch into weeks and months and years. We have felt as if the world is passing us and our dimming dreams by, offering success to everyone but us. Cynicism seems to be lurking at the edges of our thoughts, and again, our minds turn to quitting. BUT…

Then there are these brief chances…moments when you have to stop and realize that there is a God that is in all good things. It’s not simply luck, or life breaking your way instead of so often going against you. Good is good. It is creative, bringing life to the voids in existence. We don’t see ourselves as good. We were told in Sunday School that we were born into sin. We have had injustices and neglect and violence thrown at our paths. Yet, our lives, our bodies ourselves are miracles. We are miracles. We are good. And in that, we glimpse an order in the middle of all this chaos. That order is God. And God is the type of good we know by another name: love. And love cannot be overcome. Even by death, or life as we know it.

WE GOT THE HOUSE.

We have a home (a rental home) that can be a haven when life slams against us. We have a place to, in the words of wiser people than us, invite the friend and the stranger to share in what we have been blessed with. We have a home for our future, and for our memories. We have a home that is big enough for more than the two + one puppy that is our family right now. It’s a home that is still on the west side of Fort Worth that we love, but in such a way that feels entirely new and there is a lot of merit to feeling that a new day and new and good things are happening in our world and life.

We have a home, a good home. And even if we have to squint with our hearts to see and feel it…that good is God speaking in the silence and showing us a love that needs no words. And that is enough.

Bo & Heather.

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Instagramin’ Ma’am

These instagram photos are from the past couple of weeks, where Fort Worth has experienced a mix of weather that has been cool to warm which has allowed us to get out and see the city. Outdoors, treats, and plenty of time taking Emory to the park has been a good way to begin the year which has been busy to say the least. From looking for houses, to getting our house in order in more ways than one to planning for our future – these adventures and time spent together are exactly how 2012 should and have started.

Love Never Fails

Praying and believing for healing for my Grandfather….

Heather

Update: He is out of the hospital and taking it easy. My grandfather is a very, very strong man!

In All Honesty

We all live out a good portion of our lives online. Connecting with friends, collecting and documenting memories and of course, making plans for new experiences…filling out our social calendars. We have talked here on Lost In Drawers about our own discussions about any and all of us self edit online. We don’t show much of the struggle, we don’t ask the big questions. But the fact is that all of us struggle. And, honestly, it is time to talk about it openly.

We have weekly, if not seemingly daily, discussions on struggle. The question as it relates to our friends and family and to this blog and other social media is simply: can we be honest about life’s struggles yet not complain?  We constantly try and seek for perspective about our life. Yet, the doubts still hang out there about how we can be authentic and still talk honestly about life. We do believe that we can still love Jesus, lean on him, and still have a discourse about what goes wrong. So, here goes a round of transparency.

We have been married almost two and a half years, and yet it seems like no one tells you how hard real marriage is. There never was or will be a honeymoon period. It was hard from engagement until today. We are not financially stable. We have fought more than either one of us would have liked. We are stubborn, passionate, and Bo – who is an ordained minister – is in therapy for depression that has undermined much of our communication as a couple. So, the truth is this: save us the the pretty canned speeches about marriage, because we don’t need to hear theory. We need to know that it can get better, that the love we have deep in or hearts will spread to our circumstance and yes, will see us materially stable. Because in marriage, “all you need is love” isn’t enough when you have $20 and payday is 8 days away (which did happen once or twice or maybe even three times). This isn’t to say that we don’t have amazing moments, because we do.  We have explored more than most and we have the documentation in pictures and words to give us smiles for decades. Yet, we do ask ourselves: there is more to it than this, right?

The transparency has to extend further. It is easy to look at everyone’s carefully edited lives on blogs, Facebook and Twitter and wonder – what are we doing wrong? How come everyone else can buy houses left and right and we struggle to find a rental home with enough space to build a life and eventually round out our family? Because, marriage without two bathrooms REALLY is a trial. Seriously. Two bathrooms, two televisions and an office area. All married couples need this at some point. How do you talk about these questions and live a positive life? Do we need a mansion? No. But how is it that others (at least publicly) are doing well on many fronts – often at younger ages – and we look at life and ask… why are we still waiting on an answer to this or that, a path or a way to our future to open, a patch of hope in the midst of darkness?

Life is complicated. The issue we often have with our Christian faith is the the way our religious environments apply the story of God & Creation to life now. Being a minister and not having an outlet to use one’s calling with no ability to pay off a seminary education, and being a independently-minded prospective female business owner and always waiting on someone else to answer so we can move forward with plans can be maddening. “No” and “wait” and never yes is never easy. Yet, all our and your lives we are given simplified answers to impossibly nuanced problems. “Trust in the Lord” we are told. Okay, but how do we balance surrender/trust with engagement and truly caring about something. God is not a genie in a bottle, but our faith hinges on God still existing and active in our worlds. How does “simple faith” answer us, as when those who may not believe and even outspoken against Christian faith are better off in life than we are? Can we die to caring about these things without slipping into a life of mediocrity and giving up on big bold dreams for our life? Yet, all we see out of both ourselves and others in this digital world is carefully curated lives that smack of a magic show of Instagram, Pinterest, Etsy, inspirational quotes and digital friendships than never stop down to say – today I don’t understand how our culture can be so unfair and cruel.

Does the fact that we question and are honest about how society has stacked the cards against many of us change our faith? No. We remain in love with a God who’s earthly embodiment in one Jesus taught of a different way and proved his commitment even until death. We believe in resurrection, not only of Him, but ourselves and our hopes for a better life. Why? Because because of the same complicated nature of life that causes us to ask so many hard questions. Life is delicate, intricate and always surprising. And in spite of all our worrying, struggling to keep the electric bill paid, frustration in communicating, dealing with relationships with family & friends that are often in flux and spiritual searching (in hearts and for a new church currently) – we saw something. We are a part of something sacred and ancient. We saw that this is the story of the Scriptures. The stories of history. Anyone who is remembered dared to be honest. We hope we are doing the same.

Bo & Heather

P.S. I tried to fix every grammatical and punctuation mistake, but sometimes my passion gets the best of me!

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Tale as old as time Song as old as rhyme Beauty and the Beast

There is something about Disney that is beyond wonderful, no matter one’s age. So, our house has been buzzing when we found out the Disney vault was re-releasing the classic Beauty in the Beast…wait for it…in 3D! Now, to be honest we are not the biggest 3D fans but we were game and today we got to see the classic featuring everyone’s favorite Belle, that Beast chap and a cast of enchanted housewares. And it was everything we had hoped for and MORE. Disney above any other studio does 3D right, using it with care and to great effect. They know that good story is the key, and everything else is just a bonus. It was better looking than ever before and of course the story and songs are timeless, you know, a tale as old as time. Go see it!

Up next…The Little Mermaid 3D….September 2013! Pretty Epic!

the dust of retreat

Let’s be honest. While it is the new year, there are moments when the year feels in no way new. Bills that were issued in 2011 come due in 2012. Essays and blogs from days or even months ago go unattended. Old habits die hard. New (good) ones are not so easily picked up. Life is a struggle for balance, for pockets of calm in the middle of storms that rage all around us, deep inside us. Like the song says, we truly are “creatures of the wind, wild as the wind.” Our life as a couple is one that truly does seek out adventure. We look for the good and beautiful in all things. We crave unbridled independence. But there is a equal opposite reaction to these desires. Our passions spill over into fights, each of us trying desperately to understand the other.

It often feels as if as soon as you get married you are suppose to have a life perfectly curated and put together, as if there is a unseen judge watching your every move. But no one has much of a clue when they get married, and the ones that appear so are so often hiding from themselves,  And yet, the norm is to try to present a unified front of serene success. Like we all have six figure salaries and perfect bungalows? Most don’t.  Life > blogging. Blogging and social media are tools, not ends to a mean. Simply put, blogging is a recording device, not a creative endeavor. Living, truly living every day as if it is a precious jewel…that’s an endeavor. That is worth, well. So, we ask ourselves real questions. Will we LIVE out our dreams in this new year? How can we make this world, this CITY we love better? Will we love each other deeper? Can we form community and deep friendships with people that last? Yes, it is the new year and it is better and different and exciting and frightening. And the questions are old and new and different and the same. Let’s go adventuring and see if the answers are in the art of living.

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Just Another Polka Dot Monday

Monday arrived with a list of things to do, most of which pertained to the continual organization of our spare room turned office/workspace/dressing room. Needless to say, I feel as if I have been cooped up all day working constantly on the space, finding an order to my desk that feels right and creating an inspiration wall. Listening to Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s on repeat. And what was not helping? Fort Worth weather. It has been raining on and off since last night, but it did stop for a few this afternoon.

And so, I got dressed and this is what I wore. Sadly, I had to take that polka dot jacket back to the store because it was a little snug, but it maybe just had to be photographed. But things are progressing and I am thrilled for the new year’s possibilities.

Heather

Outfit Description: Polka Dot Jacket-xx1, Shirt-Anthropologie, Cuffed Jeans-Ross, Vintage Boots-Goodwill, Bag-H&M

Slow Show

It is the new year, and we are on a mission for renewal, with new adventures and new rhythms, including redoing our extra room to make an all new creative work space for Heather. With our Alice-adorned Macbook (a Christmas present for Heather), we got a few ideas and with the help of IKEA, our family and a few hours, we were able to take the room and create an office, sewing and dressing room. Thanks to our family for helping out, and of course it was so great to have them in town for part of the weekend and to explore IKEA and downtown Dallas. Always a good time. Speaking of new years, well we have been bombarded with the wonder of Girl Scout cookies. Hello Thin Mints and PB Patties, you just made us add extra time to the evening walk with Emory. Cookies make everything a little bit better.

Meet Me In Mississippi

From the moment we crossed back into Mississippi on our return trip from Florida, we really loved everything about Mississippi. It is beautiful, charming and quite surprising. We had been driving so much on our road trip and we really needed a break. What better way than the beach? As the fog rolled across the south from Florida to Texas, we stopped off in Gulfport and this is the result of Emory’s first beach trip where he ate sand, frolicked about and we generally got one of the best moments of our life in the dense fog and white sand.

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